Wtorek 22 Sty 2008, 5:03

This is just a rough sketch of a conversation we had at Papa John's today. It isn't by any means exact. This is just usually how our conversations go. Thought you guys on last.fm would find this funny.

CALEB: (singing) "You are beautiful, in every single way. Words won't bring us down."
KEITH: You know Christina Aguilera didn't write that song.
JACOB: Who did?
K: The woman that writes Pink's songs.
J: No, she didn't. That's Christina's song.
K: No, someone else wrote the song.
C: Who wrote what song?
J: The one you were singing.
K: Someone else wrote that song.
C: Who did?
J: The woman that did Pink's songs. She's a famous songwriter.
C: Umm … Carole King?
J: No. Not Carole King.
K: The woman that wrote it is a lesbian.
C: And it's not Carole King?
J: Carole King is not a lesbian! She had a solo career, or she was in a band. She's a popular songwriter. She used to have dreds like back in 2003 and now her hair is really short.
C: kd lang?
J: No.
K: I think it's that woman that did … how does that song go? … "I bet you think this song is about you."
C: OH …. her name starts with C-A-R
J: It's not Carole King! Carole King is not a lesbian!
C: No. Not Carole King! Ummm … Carley Simon.
K: Oh, that's right.
C: Carley Simon's a lesbian?!
K: Oh, she's a big ol' lesbian.
J: Oh … Her name was … Linda … something.
C: Linda McCartney?
J: Linda McCartney is not a lesbian!
C: Is it that woman from the 4 Non Blondes.
J: I don't know.
C: Her name is Linda. She had dreds and a big hat. She wrote music for Bryan Adams.
J: What is her last name?
C: I don't know. I don't think she had a solo career.
J: Ok.
C: … Linda Ronstadt?
J: No, she's black. This woman was white.
K: Linda Ronstadt is not black.
C: She's a country singer.
J: Well, who am I thinking of?
K: What is that? Is her name Dutch? Scandinavian?
C: I think it's Norwegian.
K: Who is that?
C: (singing) "I don't know much. But I know I love you." with Aaron Neville.
K: No, she's gay like Larry Bird, that guy from Phoenix.
J: Larry Bird is from Boston.
K: No, he's not.
J: Larry Bird.
K: Yeah.
J: The coach for the Celtics.
C: The Celtics.
J: The Celtics.
K: Larry … Bird. Uh … no … I mean, Charles Barkley.
C: Charles Barkley is gay?
K: Oh, he is so gay! He's so gay, he's a white man.
J: What about that guy … Magic?
C: Magic Johnson is not gay! He has AIDS!
J: Oh, ok. … What about that other guy? The Mailman?
K: What is his name?
J: Hey, Justin, what is that basketball player's name for the Utah Jazz?
JUSTIN: Karl Malone. He retired at 43, surpassing Michael Jordan by one year, I think.
J: Ok.
C: It's not Carole King?
J: Carole King is not a lesbian!
C: And it's not Carly Simon?
J: No. I think her name's Linda.
C: Linda McCartney?
J: Linda McCartney is not a lesbian!
C: I think it's the woman from the 4 Non Blondes. All those boys looked pretty gay. I didn't know she was a lesbian. I think you're thinking of her. I don't know her last name, though.
J: Linda … Linda … Linda …
C: Is it Stevie Nicks?
J: Stevie Nicks is not a lesbian. She had sex with that guy in Fleetwood Mac. What's his name?
C: Mic Fleetwood.
J: No, the other one.
C: I don't know his name.
J: Justin, what was the name of the guy in Fleetwood Mac?
C: … who isn't Mic Fleetwood?
J: He had a girl's name.
JUSTIN: … Leslie.
JACOB: Leslie Buckingham!
C: Lindsey Buckingham!
J: What was that other girl's name.
K: There was no other girl.
J: Yes, there was.
C: Hutch might know. Let's ask him. … Hutch, what was the name of the other girl in Fleetwood Mac?
HUTCH: There was no other girl.
J: Yes, there was. She sang backup vocals.
H: Well, everyone sings backup vocals.
J: She sang lead on those two songs.
H: Well.
C: Do you know the 4 Non Blondes?
HUTCH: (singing) wake up in the mornin' and get real high …
C: Yeah! Do you know the lead singer's name?
H: …
C: We know her first name is Linda. We just don't know her last name.
H: Linda McCartney.

By the way, her name is Linda Perry. She was the lead singer of the 4 Non Blondes. She is a lesbian, and she wrote "Beautiful" for Christina Aguilera. She also wrote music for Pink, like "Let's Get This Party Started." She did not write anything for Bryan Adams.

Christine McVie was the other girl in Fleetwood Mac.

4 non blondeslinda perrypinklinda ronstadtbeautifulfleetwood macstevie nickslinda mccartneykd langlindsay buckinghammic fleetwoodchristina aguilerabryan adamsdon't know muchaaron nevillecarly simonchristine mcvieCarole King